Trust Fall

If you’re an astrology geek like me, you’ve been following the cosmic dance lately, and in particular, the crazy Bob Fosse moves of Uranus into Gemini. The planet of big changes and new beginnings entered the airy sign of Gemini back in August of 2025 and will be in this sign for the next 7 years. Given that Gemini is the airy planet of communication, learning, and SO many words, it feels to me like I’m trying to keep up with the Jazzercise instructor calling out dance steps with the speed of an auctioneer. What the WHAT?

Here’s how this rebellious change-making astrology has been showing up for me lately:

I’ve been working in the field of worksite wellness and population health for over 25 years, and most recently had spent about 8 years with a company, though small, had helped me settle into my gifts of consulting, teaching, and collaborating with a family that had been built over 30+ years. I loved my co-workers, loved the work and my clients, and thought that I would likely stay until I retired.

But then we got a new dance partner. And then it was just like the junior high square dancing sessions in PE class - do-si-do and change your partner, and oh-my-god, I have to dance with THIS person?!? We thought we’d die from embarrassment and had no capacity for the sheer onslaught of teenage awkwardness (I think I still have some PTSD from square dancing, btw.)

Our company was bought by what we thought was a single entrepreneur who was really invested in wellness and population health. Come to find out that it was actually a venture capitalist who was more interested in “flipping the house for profit” than really tending to a company culture and building something meaningful.

We all tried to be engaged, embrace the change, but it became clear that things were different - and not in a good way. I’ll spare the details on what followed, but let’s just say that the culture started to dissolve and whatever haphazard strategies were implemented created more chaos than clarity. We were all feeling it, and it was starting to take a toll on our individual and collective wellbeing. I, for one, was starting to feel incredibly disillusioned and found my energy completely drained by the changes in the company and the industry that no longer seemed to ignite my vocational fire.

Sure, we all talked about leaving, but none of us really made plans to exit. We kept hanging on, hoping things would iron out. But then…some employees were let go (or pushed out), and the walls felt like they were starting to close in. Still, we hung on because of a belief that was outdated and ultimately, no longer serving us. Perhaps you’ve heard some version of these beliefs too:

The grass isn’t always greener (at another company)…

The job market is really tough, best to keep the job you have…

The economy is bad, best keep the job you have…

I’m too old to make a change now…

I can’t just quit! How will I make a living?

[fill in your own]

Now, let me be clear - I am not judging any of these statements or beliefs as bad. For some, including myself, they were solid arguments for staying, and ultimately they were SAFE.

Ahem. Uranus would like to have a word.

Given my life-long patterns, I was consistently remarking how I wanted to leave and do something different - maybe even [gasp] leave corporate altogether, but I only ever gave it a half-hearted effort. Applying for a job here or there, or starting a side-hustle that I was convinced would remain very much on the side, like a tiny paper bowl of ranch dressing. My passion continued to drain and I truly didn’t think there was a way out.

But whenever I find myself in these situations where my poor Libra rising self can’t make a definitive decision to save her life, the Universe steps in and says, “Uh, she’s not getting the message. Turn up the heat to 11!” The challenges kept coming and it finally hit a breaking point where I knew - I mean, I KNEW - I was done.

Not just done. D.O.N.E.

I told my angels and guides that they were now on notice to find me a path “up and out” for my highest good - and I was delighted when I got a second interview the following day. And then a third interview. With the benefits package and information about the onboarding process. See? Here’s the way out and I had it in the bag…

…until the bag was offered to someone else. YIKES!

So, “Plan A” was unceremoniously swiped off the table. Now what? I’ve never navigated uncertainty very well, and maybe you can relate. A wave of unhelpful thoughts swept me out to see and precariously near the edge of a cliff. Thoughts like:

How could you be so irresponsible. Again?

You quit prematurely and now it will be harder to find another job!

Just LOOK at how little money you have - how will you survive until the next opportunity?

Oh, so you think you can just become a full-time successful entrepreneur overnight? Who are you kidding? You’re not cut out for that…

However, after having a teeny tiny melt-down, I realized - I wasn’t in a free-fall.

I was in a Trust Fall.

For all the studying, learning, discussing, and teaching about the ways that the Universe is always here to support us, I somehow came to believe that these philosophies didn’t apply to me. But how many times have I been in this liminal space wondering if everything was going to work out only to find that I was held, carried, and lovingly transported to an even better place. I’ve survived broken relationships, bankruptcies, starting over (a couple of times), starting businesses that didn’t make it, hell - I’ve survived perimenopause!

Through it all, I have been completely cared for, sometimes in miraculous ways, and now I was being reminded that the greatest (and hardest) work of all was to surrender to complete trust in the Divine. Not just lip-service, but really offering up my life, my finances, my work to the Divine and fully trusting that my needs will be met and that I will be guided on my journey. So many teachers have told us - the Universe/Divine/God actually WANTS us to succeed. We just have to get out of our own way so our spirit helpers can actually help.

I can see now that perhaps there was a reason that things happened the way that they did - my exasperated guides know full well that I have a habit of staying in places long after the expiration date and sometimes they have to get my attention in creative ways. Like, dissolving a relationship so I could more fully heal from my wounded patterns, or turning up the discomfort at a job I have outgrown, or not letting an opportunity pass (despite wanting it with my whole being) because I wasn’t ready and something better was about to arrive.

In this case, it felt a little bit like “bait-and-switch” as my guides listened to my plea and dangled a very enticing carrot in front of me in order to get me to take the confident leap and turn in my notice (that was a very satisfying day, let me tell you) only to remove it and say - Wonderful! Now we have better plans for you!

And the new clients keep booking, my networking community keeps introducing me to interesting people who can offer exciting new opportunities, resources are being shared that meet my needs in creative ways I had not previously considered. Nature abhors a vacuum, they say, and thus where one thing is removed from our grubby, tight-fisted grasp, something shiny and new will be put in its place. Always.

So, I’ll keep one foot in front of the other, I’ll keep offering myself up to the Divine’s plan for how I can serve best, knowing that the goal is not an end-point on our journey, it is to simply stay on the path.

To open our arms wide, lean back, and fall into the loving arms of the only One who can care for us best.

Take the leap. Surrender. And learn to fly.

xo

Anji